HOPE

FINDING SOLACE IN THE DEPTHS OF MY HEART

HOPING FOR PEACE AND STRENGTH FOR A NEW START.

IT HURTS YOU KNOW THE CONSTANT FIGHTS,

CAN'T OVERLOOK SO MANY WRONGS FOR ONE RIGHT.

LIKE DAGGERS WE PIERCE EACH OTHER

NOTHINGS LEFT BUT HURT AND BOTHER.

RUNNING BLOOD MIX WITH THE TEARS

BUT STAYING APART IS OUR BIGGEST FEAR.

HOW DO WE TURN AROUND FROM HERE?

DOES THE NEXT JUNCTION LEAD TO SOMEPLACE NEW?

THE TIME IS PASSING AND THE CHANCES LEFT ARE FEW.

THE DARKNESS OVERBEARS BUT I STILL HOPE

STAY WITH ME, LET ME HELP YOU COPE.

THEIR IS LIGHT AT THE END OF THIS TUNNEL

I WANT A FUTURE AND I HAVE NOT GIVEN UP,

PROVE ME RIGHT DARLING, HOLD MY HAND

EMBRACE ME WITH YOUR WARMTH AND 

KEEP WHAT WE HAVE ALIVE.

Defining life

Its a spare paper 

waiting for the artist.

It is woven music

 waiting for the lyrics.

Not bare sand but rigid stone,

 it needs a sculptor.

Life is a new house

 you have to decorate.

Life is the new register

 you have to write in.

It is an empty sheet

 waiting for your imprint.

One Day

Mother where are my shoes? Neeta where is my wallet? Mom where is my red tee?

She was up in a second, moving through the house, picking up things, handing things to the person who demanded it. This was a morning like every other morning. She wondered if this perhaps was the problem. The alarm on the bedside screamed everyday at 5 am and the day began even before she could open her eyes. Breakfast was to be ready by 7.30 and lunches packed by 8. By 9 she was all alone and ready to begin her daily work. The cleaning lady was late again, the tap in the kitchen needed fixing, the sheets have to be changed and everything has to be organized.

The day hadn't ended but her work was done, surprisingly. When was the last time she had time for herself? It was hard to remember. But this was her time, she hadn't decided what she would do. Her memory wasn't this weak, why couldn't she remember what she liked to do? Well she could always finish other chores, there'll be time for herself later. She had totally forgotten that there were clothes to be washed and ironed. Her memory was getting weak, she had never forgotten anything.

Lunch was always easier, she was mostly alone. Evening wasn't something she looked forward to though. She had enough free time to not know what to do. She thought about going back to her music but never really got to it. Marriage had put a stop to what little she had of her own. Now it was morning, day and night one after the other. She did it again, started thinking about how life had changed. She needed to stop this day dreaming and return to reality.

Night couldn't have come faster. Dinner was all ready. Dinner was served. How was the day? No answer. Can we go out this weekend? Busy. Dinner was done. They are tired we can talk later. I'll clean up, why don't you go on. Finally she could talk to him. Silence. There is always tomorrow.

Contagious

I did not see it coming

as I turned the corner.

You came out of nowhere

and I was infected.

I could not keep it

I didn't want to.

He was unaware that

he was the next victim.

It was early morning

I did not desire it.

Last evening was enough

I had more than I needed.

Its contagious

I have already passed it.

The next person is lucky

he didn't sleep all night.

It made its way 

through the day.

It traveled through the city

it returned to me at night.

I could feel it coming up

I wanted to suppress.

I have work to do

I don't want it anymore.

This yawn is infecting

me and making me lazy.

I wish you hadn't given it to me

I wish I wasn't sleepy.

I'll find my way?

Its dark and its gloomy. The road is never ending. Its been hours since I've been walking. 


All day long there was a bad feeling in the back of my mind. Now it has all come true. I don't know what is happening. I couldn't care less about it. But why am I sad? I don't know. Everything seems to be falling down. The buildings are crumbling and my life is too. What is the reason? I don't know. It all  happened so fast, I didn't even have a chance to blink.


Now what do I do? I don't know. Its all messed up, its complicated. I can't find the right path. How hard can it be to light a match and light a candle. Its hard enough. The sky is dark and the rain is black. The earth beneath my feet seems to be slipping slowly. I try to hold on to everything I had but its all out of my grip before I can think. When did all these paths intersect my way? I never saw them coming. Am I blind? Or am I lost? There is no more a destiny to look to and no path to follow. Its all wilderness now.


How can this be the end? Its my fairy tale and it can't end now. I'm not ready to let it go. I can make it up all again and go back to the way I remember. This story is never ending, I'll make sure it is. I won't give up. A minute before I was happy, I don't know where it all went. I have to find it and get it back. Its going to be hard I know but I'll still try. This darkness is oppressing, will I ever find my way out? Suddenly my strength is fading away and so am I. This is too hard, I can't do it. I'm giving up, I'm embracing the blackness, I'm going away. I'm dying.